How times change

First off, let me apologise for the serious lack of blogging for the past week or so, we've been having a bit of a rough time. Hubby has been really sick, not 'man flu' sick, but really, scarily, emergency room at three in the morning sick... not good. But he's making a swift recovery now and so I thought I'd better catch up on all the news - although to be honest this has been kind of all-consuming for us all. Hubby because he felt so terrible, me because I was so worried about him (I've know the guy for 16 years and never seen him look so awful - yellow and grey at the same time?!), and Molly because she was so confused about the whole thing. It's hard to explain to a 16 month old that yes daddy is home all day, woo hoo! but no you can't climb all over him and he doesn't really feel like playing at the moment.

Anyway, last week we were visiting our friends in Rakaia, looking forward to lots of cuddles with the new baby, and Molly loves playing with her big sister Anna. This is a great drive for me, Molly always sleeps and the views of the mountains are awesome. Nice big road, lots of passing places. But what is it that makes some people dawdle along at 60kph until we get to a passing spot and then accelerate to 120kph? Bloody mindedness? I think so. This happened a couple of times, same man, and eventually I just thought, bugger it, I'll floor it until I get round him. I got round him, no drama (apart from, of course, his need to drive on my bumper for about 20km afterwards), and then I freaked out... How could I do 120kph with Moo in the car? How could I be so irresponsible? And then it hit me that 120kph is only about 75mph, which is the approximate speed of every car on the road in the UK. I used to drive around town at almost that speed every day, and now I'm freaking out about doing that speed on a straight road, with 40kms visibility on both directions... what happened to me? when did I turn into my Nana? Oh yeah, that's right, I'm a Mum.

Everything has the capacity to scare me now (although I'll admit I've always been a world class worrier) Some days I avoid the news just in case there has been an unseasonal storm which heralds the start of a global warming meltdown, or more death and destruction the middle east which must mean the end of the world is nigh. Depends how fragile I'm feeling you know. Everything needs to be considered in minute detail, pros and cons weighed and measured... otherwise minor (or major) freak outs occur as I marvel at my own foolhardiness (is that a word or did I just make it up?), and the state of the world, oh god, don't even get me started, where are those worry beads...